GE Lighting 3/20/96, 4/17/96

S. William Kost
P.O. Box 598
Clackamas, OR 97015

March 20, 1996

General Electric Company
GE Lighting, Nela Park
Cleveland, OH 44112
Attention: Sales Dept.

Dear Lighting Salesperson,

I would like more information about ordering your "Big Bucket o' Bulbs for $25" as advertised in Northwest Frugality Quarterly (Spring '96, pg. 72). As I am the caretaker for a large nighttime skydiving facility, I know the importance of high quality bulbs in mass quantities; one defective bulb could mean the difference between a safe landing and waking up hanging upside-down by a thin rope from a fifty-foot tree branch.

My main concern is that there will be a limit to the number of Buckets I may purchase. I am certain that many other readers have already taken advantage of this offer; this probably means that your supply may run out too soon if I were to place an order for approximately six thousand Buckets as planned. If this is a problem, please contact me as soon as possible. Thank you.

Sincerely,

S. William Kost

P.S. Could you send me an XL T-shirt for my brother Fritz in the Army? He's a big fan, too!

NO RESPONSE... SECOND TRY

S. William Kost
P.O. Box 598
Clackamas, OR 97015

April 17, 1996

General Electric Company
GE Lighting, Nela Park
Cleveland, OH 44112
Attention: Sales Dept.

Dear Lighting Salesperson,

About a month ago I wrote to you asking for information concerning a Big Bucket o' Bulbs for $25, as advertised in a recent issue of Northwest Frugality Quarterly. Well, I feel a bit embarrassed; I was mistaken about the type of bulbs that were featured. They were of the botanical variety, not the electrical! I hope that I haven't caused you any undue stress, making you run around frantically searching for an ad you know nothing about so it can be stopped immediately. I know the feeling. Last year, I was reading the newspaper, and in the help-wanted section was an ad which had my company's name (Alberta's Night Drop Skydiving) and my phone number—but the ad was looking for a full-time pasta cook (from Alberto's Italian restaurant)! Well, the paper didn't have a number to call, so they found Alberta's in the phone book and ran the ad with that number! Never mind how they missed the Night Drop Skydiving part of my listing....

So again, I'm terribly sorry for the confusion. And, to let you know, I found an alternative to the massive number of light bulbs! I was just today put in touch with a guy who runs a firefly farm very close to my drop zone! This will save me thousands in electric bills, not to mention broken-glass-related injuries from all of the trampled bulbs!

Thanks again for your time! Bye!

Glowing with Excitement,

S. William Kost

P.S. Next time you're in the Portland area, be sure to stop by for a tour!

AGAIN, NO RESPONSE