The Prank Letters of S. William Kost

Over the last ten years, I have written dozens of joke letters, sometimes under pseudonyms, to companies large and small in America and around the world. Many of these companies have written back.


Monday, March 06, 2006

Tinactin 9/19/96

I really start to play up the "idiot" persona by adding more spelling and grammatical errors...

S. William Kost
P.O. Box 598
Clackamas, OR 97015

September 19, 1996

Tinactin Division
Schering-Plough Health
  Care Products, Inc.
Memphis, TN 38151

Dear Fungus Fighters,

I've been using Tinactin Deodorant Powder Aerosol for a while now, and have been quite pleased with the results. As I work for the city as a sewer unclogger, I am required to wear water- and airtight boots. Since the ventilation is poor, as I don't have to tell you, foot fungus can be a problem. So I use Tinactin to keep away the fungus, and congradulations on making a produt that works!

There's a sort of problem, though. See, last weekend I was watching a game on TV (I don't remember which one), and anyways that commercial with John Mandon saying BOOM all the time, and it showed a foot with actual flames on it being extinguished by Tinactin! And I thought, "hey! that stuff can put out flames, and it's cheaper than a fire extinguisher, why don't I buy a couple of cans for the truck to use in a pinch! But then I looked at the can, to see if it was okay to test out on a match or something, and! I saw the warning label, which says "do not spray while smoking or near fire." (It also said to avoid spraying in eyes, but that's another letter, because who would be dumb enough to spray it in your eyes?)

The question I have is, if the can says not to use it near flame, how was Jon Madon able to do it in the commercial?

Please write back to me soon, because at this point I'm not sure who to believe. Plus the extinquisher is almost empty because of an incident with the toaster, and it's getting time to get a new one.

Burning to Know,

S. William Kost


Anonymous Anonymous said...


3/17/2006 5:45 PM  

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